Pride Month: ‘I was petrified; thought I am being denied ‘

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Prashant Priyadarshi, also known as’Bahar“Has two different personalities – one he adopts while he is dragging and the other when he is no longer. “I identify as gay and like being referred to as ‘she / she’ when I’m in clothes and ‘he / he’ when I’m not in clothes.”

Priyadarshi, who is from Patna but works in Bengaluru, runs a clothing company and a marketing production house. He is also the content creator at Trell, a lifestyle video and shopping app.

“I would know [I was gay] when i was 13 years old. I had my very first kiss at school with a classmate. I told my best friend about it in college. Until then, I was in the closet, ”he says indianexpress.com.

While Priyadarshini was born in 2013, his family found out three years later, in 2016.

‘I was scared to death’

Before accepting his truth in front of his family, Priyadarshini was “scared to death.” He tells this point of sale that he assumed he “will be denied by everyone and never talk to anyone.” [him] again “.” I was petrified. I didn’t actually tell my mother directly. I asked my best friend over the phone because I didn’t have the courage. “

What happened next was something he hadn’t imagined.

“My mother called my sister and cried on the phone. Not because her only son turned out to be gay, but because she thought she could have helped me have a better childhood. [That she] could have supported me when I was bullied, could have helped me manage my mental health, could have made me feel like a normal boy.

“She cried because she thought she had failed as a mother because she couldn’t understand the misery of her son, with whom he had lived for two decades.”

His sister, who had previously outed Priyadarshini, also got emotional. “She was always so supportive.”

“I would not have survived without friends”

Fortunately for him, Priyadarshini has allies in his friends. “I thank all my friends who were there for me through thick and thin. Without them, I would not have survived, ”he says, adding that LGBTQ + people must first accept themselves.

“You have to start loving yourself first. Once you do this, you will find that everything else falls into place automatically. The way you look at yourself is how other people perceive you. So always keep your head high and carry your personality confidently; be fearless, ”he concludes.

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